My first experience of being coached came when I returned from maternity leave, after my first child and had started working with a new organisation. I didn’t feel I needed coaching but the organisations Director had invested in all of the senior management team to have 3 sessions. I wouldn’t say I was reluctant to be coached I just couldn’t see, when I was so new to the role, how it would really benefit me.
3 months later and I was sold, the process had unlocked so much potential in me and was helping me thrive. I felt so in control, empowered and confident in my abilities that I was managing the demands and challenges of work and my young family with ease. The coaching helped me realise that whilst my loyalty and work ethic were through the roof my self belief was really lagging behind, I spent too much time comparing myself with others doing similar roles and that wasn’t helping anyone. I was allowing my limiting beliefs to take hold and tell me I wasn’t quite good enough even though I was very successful in my role. The coaching taught me how to challenge these thoughts and I continued to make little changes, constantly reminding myself that I was good enough.
I came to realise that I was a natural and instinctive coach and that I had been demonstrating these skills in support of others, for years. Whilst I was positively listening to and empowering others I wasn’t doing the same for me and bad habits in terms of my own self belief were creeping back in. On reflection I can now see that I was really sabotaging how I showed up in every aspect of my life. I would never, ever, dream of talking to a colleague or friend the way I was talking to myself on a daily basis and that had an impact. With another baby on the way I lost my balance further and looking after me slipped down my list of priorities.
It was years later when I next experienced coaching, for me. At this point I was Co-director of an organisation and the Board, keen to invest in their leaders and arranged coaching as a support and supervision measure. As a charity leader I was juggling it all, performance, fundraising, a landscape of cuts and the very real feeling that I was responsible for my staff teams livelihoods. On top of this the very essence of charities sets a pressure like no other, if I didn’t perform I was taking away life changing services from vulnerable individuals, its’ a wonder I ever slept! At this point coaching was a real investment and it again provided breathing space, clarity and a chance to focus on me.
The penny dropped over these years of coaching, there was somebody wholly interested in me and enabling me to make my life better. I found joy in sharing and discovered the strategies I needed to cope. It shifted my perspective, gave me focus and helped me see the priorities, set the goals and apply a course of action. Most importantly it made inroads into me transforming my mindset and today I know that I am more than enough and I focus on my strengths, not giving in to the little voices who want to compare, create pressure and box me in. I can honestly say I am now being my best and most authentic self and that is truly liberating.
During my coaching sessions I started visioning (a great coaching technique) the development of my own coaching practice. This was really powerful and a catalyst to take action, so I utilised my counselling and behavioural training, my 20 years of people development skills, undertook additional accredited coaching training, did hours of coaching and now it’s a reality I am helping to make a real difference to people’s lives through my very own coaching practice.
Trusting and building rapport with your Coach is integral to the success of the process, If you would like to explore whether my style of coaching could help bring about your transformation, support your wellbeing and help you overcome barriers and grow, then lets start a conversation and see what we can do together.
hello@victoriabrennan.co.uk
